School is out and the kids have their whole time to themselves. This of course means that they will be spending more unsupervised time alone at home, and in some cases with the house help while parents are away. It is important for parents to reiterate these basic safety rules to their kids in an age-appropriate language in order to be safe throughout the holiday season.
“Words can inspire. And words can destroy. Choose yours well” –
Words can be extremely damaging, and what may seem like an offhanded remark to our children in an annoyed moment can cause serious emotional repercussions for children down the line. Children can often push even “a Saint” to their breaking point. I’ve been absolutely floored by what I’ve heard parents say and do that severely affect their children. It is not an easy task, but we need to make more conscious effort to MIND OUR LANGUAGE with our children.
Below are the 10 things I believe parents should NEVER say or do to their children, if they want to ensure their children grow up as healthy, happy, balanced, self-reliant, self-confident, and self-loving as possible:
Sometimes last year during Independence Day church program, a child asked her mother, mummy tell me more about Nigeria and the mother answered after few seconds of being dumbfounded, what would you like to know? How hilarious lol. Obviously, nothing came to her mind but just to at least answer the child, she responded with another question before she finally said I will tell you when we get home. Even me, I can’t deny the fact that I would always struggle to come up with cool, amazing and fun facts about Nigeria and this applies to many parents as well. Just before your kids have any reason to ask this on Independence Day, I have compiled some few facts about Nigeria to reel out to them. (more…)
October 1st can most times be a sobering day, because you are tempted to think that Nigeria as nation has not achieved much. It seems we take two steps forward and five backwards. But I like to always be optimistic and look at the glass as half full rather than half empty. While there are things I am ashamed of, there are a lot of things to appreciate about being Nigerian and living here. Today I ask myself, how do I begin to instil that same level of patriotism in my children who will be the leaders and change agents of tomorrow? (more…)
The world is changing rapidly with technology and the fact that the world is a global village, skills learnt today can easily become obsolete tomorrow. With technology doing some of the day to day operation in various industry, the skill set required for the new global citizen is different. (more…)
I was reading through a post recently about homework for kids. I came across a comment by a woman that says “My first-grade son was required to research a significant person from history and write a paper of at least two pages about the person, with a bibliography. How can he be expected to do that by himself? He just started to learn to read and write a couple of months ago. Schools are pushing too hard and expecting too much from kids.” (more…)
My son is in Year 6 and would be going to secondary school next year. With entrance exams between Nov and March, this is the time to start shortlisting secondary schools. The success of a student’s high school experience has become essential to university admissions. So, it’s an important decision. I have a long list of what I’m looking for which can be summed up as a school with high academic achievement, strong level of discipline, a good balance of extracurricular activities and MUST be boarding. All my son wants is a school that has a football team. In the end, I am looking for the best environment where my son will blossom to be the best he can be. (more…)
There are times when my child says or does something and I’d be like “where did he get that from?”. I start the elimination process – Definitely not from home, not school/teachers. Of course, I know myself and I know my child’s school and teachers. So usually I’m left with friends or TV. Children spend a lot of times with their friends either in school or at home.
Knowing your child’s friends will definitely provide insight into the morals and values that are influencing your son or daughter (positively or negatively). Also, getting to know your child’s friends, will help you learn a lot about your own daughter or son as well. Kids choose friends for specific reasons, and it can be insightful to explore what those reasons are. It could be loneliness, or an attitude projected by the friend, or the lifestyle that he/she enjoys, or the things the child can do (like sports, dance, academics, etc). For whatever reasons meanwhile, it is important to know your child’s friends as it helps you to make necessary amendment when you need to.
These are few steps to help you get to know your kids’ friends.
Get to know your child’s Friends.
Ask about your child’s friends, find out what they and your child do together. Try associating with them, get to know their names, where they come from, the kind of family they are from and who the parents are. Seize opportunities to meet and interact with them during birthday parties, school events, school drop off/pickups.
Let your child know that friends are welcome in your home.
Let your kids know their friends are welcome but have some “house rules” with your child prior to the visit. Let your child, the friend, and the friend’s family know that an adult will be there with them and ultimately know what’s going on by seeing, hearing, and talking with them about what they are doing.
Never embarrass your kids in front of their friends. Doing so will lessen the likelihood that your kids will want to have their friends hang out when you are around.
Make your home inviting for hanging out
Make your home “kid-friendly” where your kids and their friends can hang out. This way, as a parent, you can pop in periodically, have some interaction with the group. Also make sure you always have some “fun food” on hand when your kids bring their friends around.
Get to know other parents.
Make time to meet with the parents, this helps you to determine whether you want your child to move too close to a particular parent’s kids. From relating with other parents, you get to understand their lifestyles and values. Talk with them on the phone, meet them at neighbourhood or school events.
Have rules for when you child hangs out at their friend’s
Do not let your child go to a friend’s house if you do not trust the parents. Be sure your child knows how to contact you in case of an emergency
Get involved in your school, church, and/or athletic you get more involved, you’ll be better positioned to identify, connect with, and channel the positive influences in your child’s environment. If your child is on a soccer team, for example, you may meet one or more families whose company you enjoy and whom you respect and admire. Be intentional about reaching out to them with invitations to socialize as families so that your child can have more exposure to these positive influences.
Agree on rules, like curfew time, and enforce the agreed-upon consequences when a rule is broken.
Know where and with whom your child is spending time.
My son has been staying up late since the beginning of the holiday and of course waking up anytime. Now that School resumes next week, it must be back to our routine. Ideally, it is best to get back to school routine at least a week before resumption. (more…)